I take it as a compliment, that not one but two people stopped and asked me for directions in German this evening. The first one probably had to do with the fact that I was humping my laundry up the street, socks hanging out of my pack like a newly bought bouquet; the second with the fact that, having had the big glass of wine, I was weaving down the wide, cobblestone sidewalks with rosy Alpine cheeks. (By the way, what does “Einschtein, bitte” mean? And if the word schmuck means “penis,” then why is it on so many storefronts? )
Anyway. It was a crazy idea, shoving my laundry into my backpack and another plastic bag, and wandering the neighborhood looking for a laundromat. I’ve been around these blocks some, and I haven’t seen such a thing. At one point, though, I walked by a trio of hipsters talking on the sidewalk outside a store, and realized that they were leaning up against empty washing machines, all in a line outdoors. Through their legs I saw that the machines were Miele, and empty, and—a really good sign—their portholes were wet and steamy.
I lost my nerve. I couldn’t do it: “Excuse me, but are these washing machines, like, for, like, strange Americans?” One of them, a pretty, spikey-haired brunette in black, looked at me, and I ran up the street, my socks bouncing on my back. It’s good that Julia finally taught me how to wash my underwear out in the sink like a pro, or tomorrow I’d be using a wife-beater as a diaper.
Hey, wadja expect? You getta shitty deal if you work with a schmuck like that.
I, too, would choose scraps of dignity over clean laundry. We need to get tougher.
Shahnaz, my love. So wonderful to see you on my blog.
Einsteigen means please geton the train and Schmuck means Jewels. We love you and I need to set up a writing date with you so text me. XOX noa
Ah–get on the train! That makes sense! And so does penis and jewels! Right! Thank you, ladies.
p.s. if you want to do your laundry over at our place you are welcome. Also there is a street of laundry mats on Torstrasse. I don’t know how to type that B that means 2 s’s but I want to. ß OH MY GOD I JUST FIGURED OUT. ßßß Option S